Each year the divorce rate is about 2.7 per 1,000 people in the United States. That number is about 746,971 divorces.
If you’re going through or about to go through child custody battles, then you might want to know some facts and truths about the process. While child custody battles can feel overwhelming, being prepared could make a difference. Read this article on different facts you’ll want to know as a father as you go through the child custody process.
1. Obtaining Time With Your Child
A common mistake your Divorce Lawyer will tell you is that fathers tend to rely on the mother to split up the time. In order to get the time necessary, it’s important to be prepared and organized. Have proof that you’re still an active part of your child’s life.
You’ll need to be ready to work together in order to get time with your child. That can include hearings, meetings with your ex, trials, or mediation. This will allow you both to come up with a custody agreement for your child.
2. Remain Active
In order to increase your odds of child custody, be sure to remain actively involved in their life. You want to prove that you are a hands-on father.
This can include supervising chores, helping with homework, participating in other routines, etc. Remember that you don’t want to only be there for the fun. That’ll make you appear like you’re not responsible.
Stay involved in church events, social gatherings, and parent-teacher conferences. Build a connection with their school administrators and teachers.
3. Keep in Touch No Matter How Far You Are
Even if you live far away, your child custody attorney will tell you to keep in touch by phone or video chat. It’s important that your kids know that you’re still part of their lives and care about them.
Keep the conversations positive in order to have your child associate chats with a nice time. Ask them about their friends, school, activities, etc. Make sure that you keep records of their parent trying to stop you from communicating with them.
In order to keep records, you’ll want to state the date and time that the prevention of communication occurs. This will also hurt the other parent’s claim for custody if they’re trying to sever communication.
4. Be Honest
If you have a full-time job, being a single parent might be tough. You’ll need to figure out how you’ll juggle work and other life responsibilities as well as making time for your child.
You’ll need to think about child care if you ever need to travel without them. Think about whether or not you’ll be able to help them with homework.
If there’s a school emergency, will you be able to pick them up? The courts might ask you these questions, so be prepared!
5. Negotiation Time
Instead of going to court, you might want to instead negotiate with their parent. You can come up with a parenting plan or agreement depending on the area that you live in.
During this negotiation, you’ll come up with decisions regarding education, religion, how often you’ll see them and split up the time, etc. This is a great way to avoid the costs and emotional pain that going to court can cause.
When you’re wondering how to get custody of children, mediation could help. This is where you, your partner, and an independent mediator will meet to come up with an agreement. They’ll try to get you both to come to a fair agreement.
6. Consider Discussing Your Salary
If you make a good amount, you can discuss your overall salary. How to get child custody can include talking about how much you make.
It’s important to prove that your money will pay for different resources that your child will need. Don’t rub it in the other parent’s face how much more you make.
7. Have Good References
Your child custody attorney will encourage you to obtain references. When you have others stating that you’re a good parent, that’s positive in your court.
Reach out to coworkers, family members, and friends. They can write affidavits where they’ll speak about your personality and how you are as a parent. If the judge won’t take affidavits, you can include testimonies from people in the community.
8. Maintain Records
Keep a record of your current parenting plans and schedule. Include in the record every way that you’re involved in your child’s life. As you prove that you spend plenty of time with your child, the court is more likely to view it as a meaningful relationship.
9. Prepare a Space for Your Child
Whether you live in an apartment or large home, there needs to be a dedicated room for your child. The court will want to see that you’ll have a spot for your child in your home.
10. Show Respect
It’s important to have respect for everyone who is involved in the process. This includes the other parent as well.
Courts will pay attention to your attitude in order to help them decide what’s the best fit for your child. Don’t let any negative feelings come out and ruin your chances of spending time with your child.
11. Be Mindful on Social Media
Don’t be negative or have bad behavior on social media. This could sabotage your chances of winning custody. Ensure that what you have on social media portrays what you want to show.
12. Don’t Talk Child Support
Many people will think that you as a father want to lower child support. This could have a negative impact on you winning the custody of your child.
13. Dealing With Parental Stereotypes
It’s common for the judge to side with the mother and choose them as the primary caregiver. In order to fight this, you can prove how you’re an active part of your child’s life and will remain like this.
Keep in mind that some states require the child under a certain age to go with their mother. Look into the tender years’ doctrine in order to see if it applies to your situation in your state.
Many states have gotten rid of this law because they view it as violating the equal protection clause. It’s viewed as discrimination based on gender.
14. Pay Child Support
In order to have better odds of winning your child custody case, pay child support on time. If you don’t, it can look like a lack of interest on your part. Even if there are arguments with the other parent, show proof that you’re consistently paying your child support on time.
15. Winning Joint Custody Is Common
As long as both parents are deemed fit to take care of their children, joint custody is common. The court will factor in the education, health, and safety of the child. You could lose joint custody if you neglect your child or your child is abused under your care.
In order to win joint custody you’ll need to:
- Show that you have similar parent skills as the other parent
- That you don’t have a history of abuse to your child
- You’re able to dedicate plenty of time to your child’s activities and education
- That you have similar time for your child that the other parent does
16. Understanding a Change of Circumstances
While there’s no specific definition, it comes down to the court modifying custody as necessary. A significant change means that a day at court is necessary in order to make changes. Something significant has occurred after the last court order.
Obstacles in Winning Child Custody
First, your child’s wishes will be taken into account. This depends on the laws in the area and the age of the child.
The other parent’s wishes will play a factor as well. If there’s domestic violence then you might not even be awarded joint custody. Also, if you aren’t married then the courts might want you to prove paternity.
Understanding Different Facts When It Comes to Child Custody for Fathers
After exploring this guide, you should have a better idea of the different facts when it comes to child custody for fathers. Take your time deciding what the best course of action is and consider speaking with a divorce or custody lawyer. While it might seem like the more expensive route initially, it could help you in the end.
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